What's Eating You? | Love Yourself Linkup

As part of the Love Yourself Linkup today, my friend Serena, who I have known through adventures in being housemates and Bible studies since our college days, is sharing part of her story. 

In my struggle with body image, it wasn't until I realized what was really bothering me about myself that I was able to begin to overcome.

A man named Paul once said, "Do not be conformed to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." I had heard the verse many times before, but found myself hitting the gym and planning my next diet all the same. I was trying to conform to what society told me was right. The weight loss was never very much and it was only achieved by a diet and lifestyle I knew I wouldn't maintain. In fact, I knew it would only be a matter of time until I gained it back, plus some.

So, I figured this would just be my life, I'd always want to eat, I would always want to have a different body, I would always hate shopping for clothes because they never looked right on me, and I wasn't ever going to be the size I wanted to be. I thought things would never change - until I met someone. Nope, not a guy (I was already married at this point), it was a neighbor who went from being an acquaintance to an eternal friend (the type that looks at life from an eternal perspective and helps you do the same, who you share your dreams and your struggles with). One day we got on the topic of working out and eating habits, which led to us both spilling the beans, "I eat even though I'm telling myself to stop, I waited until my husband had left the room to have another cookie, I don't know why! I don’t like what I do, but I still do it." We looked at each other and realized we were one in the same; we had the same issues and struggles with food and our body image. And this was the start of the healing process. Light had been shown on a dark place and we were able to look at issues that had been kept hidden. 

It was guilt that made me see myself in a negative light. I was upset about having extra bulge, but I was upset about the wrong thing! I wasn't listening to my own body, my conscience that would say, "You've had enough.” It caused me to take a deeper look, what am I feeding? Why am I depriving? On a non physical level.

I've learned a big part of body image circled back to an acceptance of my own body. Liking what I had caused a release in the pressure and stress to be something different than what I was. I had to allow food and my body to lose power over my life in order to gain power of over them.

I say all of this to encourage you to share what you are facing to someone you can trust with matters of the heart in this area of body image. We are all insecure, we all have areas we can improve or work on, and our problems become a little smaller when we realize we're not the only one facing them. It’s a matter of pin pointing what needs to be dealt with. Treating the source, not just the symptom. It's impossible to find the source if it's covered up or in the dark. Bring light into your life.

I'm being renewed from the inside and can look in the mirror and be happy with what I see. I'm not very different on the outside than I ever was, but my future is bright, my extra baggage isn't going to cling to me forever because I'm stepping out of a cycle that I had been caught in for so long. I like myself as I am.

Get to the source of your struggles, look beyond your exterior to find out where the “ugly” is coming from. You're beautiful right now, as you are, can you see it?

The Love Yourself Linkup is an ongoing series that focuses on topics such as self worth and body image. A community of woman talk about our thoughts on these subjects, tell stories of our personal experience, share what has inspired us, challenged us, and more. Learn more over at Ann the Adventurer. If you have a story to tell, and want to be a part of the link up, join the conversation by writing and clicking to enter it below. [photos via Pinterest]